6.03.2013

Yoplait, you will never be greek. Fetch will never happen.

Thoughts I'm having on food this week....
Greek yogurt. I'm on a mission to find my favorite tasting brand. So far, Fage is my favorite. Chobani plain is really... um... rough. It's rough. Chobani DARK CHOCOLATE OR KEY LIME PIE ON THE OTHER HAND IS SO DELICIOUS. Notice Key lime pie isn't seen above, because IT'S ALREADY BEEN EATEN. I want to try every brand and pick out my favorite to become a solid brand-loyal greek yogurt advocate. Oikos, Dannon and Yoplait are next on my list, except I have a hard time putting Yoplait in my evoked set of Greek yogurts because I grew up with that brand NOT as greek yogurt. It's a like a mexican friend waking up one day and deciding they're chinese. NO. YOU'RE MEXICAN. YOU'RE NOT GREEK, YOPLAIT.
Oh, and I'd sooner shoot my left foot than eat Activia #jamieleecurtisSNLskit
YOPLAIT. GREEK. LOL.


Meal replacement shakes. I love them. Always have. In high school, I was obsessed with Slimfast. They're so fast, easy to grab on the go and TASTE GOOD. I've grown up a small fraction of a bit since then and have graduated to GNC Lean brand as my favorite shake of choice. The Lean brand never fails me. HOWEVER. I stumbled upon this ☝ brand last night at Sprout's and thought I'd try it because all the fitness instagram accounts I follow always talk about "cacao."
It is vegan, gluten free, dairy free, soy free.....
AND TASTE FREE. IT IS SO PAINFULLY DISGUSTING I COULD DIE. I DID DIE ACTUALLY. I AM DEAD AS I TYPE THIS BECAUSE THIS PROTEIN POWDER IS THAT GOD AWFUL.
So this morning, in a rush as usual and realizing I wouldn't get a lunch break today, I just filled up 2 shaker cup things of this powder stuff for breakfast and lunch today. But after tasting it for breakfast on my way to work--LIKE LITERALLY CAR IN MOTION--I discovered how bad it was. I survived on 2 Nature Valley Bars today. And no, I don't think those are "clean" by "clean" standards.
And I am not picky. For me to say something tastes bad, IT MUST FREAKING TASTE BAD.
So I'm going back tonight and fist-fighting someone for my $40 back and running through snow, sleet and rain as fast as I can to the nearest GNC and begging them my forgiveness, BECAUSE FATHER, I HAVE SINNED #CHEATEDONMYFAVORITEBRAND. 
Hands down the best meal replacements out there. 
These golden sticks of love are my sweet potato fries. Cutting this sweet potato was literally the hardest physical challenge I've put myself through in a long time. This includes all the times I've read Amanda Bynes tweets recently, and God knows that's always a painful experience, so for me to say cutting this block of starch was MORE painful, is saying something. Anyways, I will surely have sore arms tomorrow from cutting that freaking potato BUT HAYYOOO LOOK AT DAT SIDE DISH. Drizzle o' olive oil, sprinkle o' salt, and you got yourself a quality housewife french fry.
Such an easy and delicious recipe--now I will have healthy french fries waiting on me every day I get home this week. Or at least until they last....
So I'll have them just tomorrow... 

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