The 30 Day Clean Eating Challenge--Do I really want to do this?

BERRIES AND ALMONDS AND SPINACH OH MY

Apparently there is this new non-fad, fad non-diet, diet going around called "CLEAN EATING." You may have heard of it. It is a scenario in which you eat clean. 

Many women out there have taken it upon themselves to take a 30-day challenge of following this plan. I'm considering associating myself with that exact stone cold pack of weirdos. 

What it is: (according to sleepeatgymrepeat.com)

• Eating food in its most natural state
• Nothing white (flour, sugar, rice, etc)
• Avoid all things processed and refined
• Lean protein and healthy fats (like those from nuts)
• Lots and lots of organic fruits and vegetables.
• Organic products
• No preservatives, no fast food, no alcohol (say whaaat?)
• No or limited dairy (depending on who you ask
• At least 8 cups of water per day
• No sodas or sugary drinks

An in-depth shopping list can be found here. 

My first impression:

• Nothing processed and refined? Goodbye 2 AM Jack in the Box runs
• NO ALCOHOL???????? ALLOW ME TO IMPLEMENT A "CHEAT DAY" RULE. Because I don't know about you but I'm feeling twenty two and day-time jaunts to Chimy's happy hour are real life and I think as long as 1 or 2 light beers doesn't turn into 48 or 49 heavy taco orders, then I'LL BE FINE. CHALLENGE NOT RUINED. (just work with me... twerk with me)
• No or limited dairy. My first stupid nutrition question is--DOES ALMOND MILK COUNT AS DAIRY??? OR SHOULD I CATEGORIZE THAT IN THE NUTS/LEGUMES SECTION??? I WILL GO WITH LIMITED DAIRY AS OPPOSED TO THE NON-DAIRY LIFESTYLE.
• I see nothing about coffee. AKA, I will continue to consume Dunkin' Donuts coffee until I die. 
• SO IF WE CAN ALL AGREE TO OVERLOOK MY MINOR ALCOHOL/COFFEE FLAWS THEN WE CAN ALL AGREE TO GET ALONG.

Why this is might not be a challenge after all:

• I already pretty much eat "clean." It's not like this will be an absolute upside down world for me--you can ask my roommate...and my nearly-empty, junk-food-free cabinet.
• I MEAN THERE ARE CHIA SEEDS IN MY FRIDGE RIGHT NOW. FREAKING CHIA SEEDS.
• I really do drink almond milk. Hash tag in real life. 
• I am not picky AT ALL when it comes to food. It's a blessing and it's a curse... So sure, I don't mind eating weird things like quinoa and kale but no, I'm not opposed to any type of pizza, taco or burger (Or cookie or ice cream or wine or frito etc etc etc)
• I already work out regularly. MAMA'S A RUNNER. 
• I am a big tea drinker. So that has to count towards something positive. 

Why I want to take on the challenge:

• Kind of just for the hell of it, man.
• Also, they say you don't have to count calories on this plan because it's all healthy. Which is great for me, because counting numbers makes me want to rock back and forth in the fetal position in a cold, dark Alaskan cave. 

When I would start the 30 day challenge:

• Sunday April 14th, 2013. Which is conveniently after my birthday, and let me just say, happy birthday to me for starting the challenge post-party. 
• So April 14-May 14. If that wasn't clear. 

Benefits of eating clean:

• Great for metabolism
• Rids body of harmful toxins, preservatives and chemicals 
• Glowing skin
• Stronger nails
• Healthier hair
• Better sleep
• More energy
• I mean, LOSING WEIGHT??? ONE COULD WOULD ASSUME????????

The real challenge for me will be eating this way for 30 days straight WITH NO EATING OUT, OR HUGE ALCOHOL HOO-RAH'S. Money may prove to be an issue as well. We'll see how that plays out.. 

ALSO, I might mention that I've been drinking beer like a fish lately. I feel this is necessary to point out because this IS SO UNLIKE ME. I've NEVER been a beer-girl. Ugh, I'm officially growing up, and as if picking out my cap and gown and graduate invitations the other day wasn't enough of a reminder, NOW I LIKE TO DRINK BEER AND HAVE OUTGROWN MY CHILDISH VODKA CRANBERRY WAYS. 

Others who took on the challenge:

• Cookie & Ozzy
• Little runner girl
• Skinnie Minnie Moves
• And various friends in the lubbock area that I will coerce to join me on this venture

Balsamic glazed cracked pepper salmon recipe here

Last thoughts:

• Am I going to commit suicide day 29?
• Am I capable of eating THAT clean for THAT long with NO exceptions I.E. mexican food?
• Is this going to be outrageously expensive? Am I going to have to apply to a scholarship and/or take out a loan and/or become a prostitute to get through this month?
• WILL I SURVIVE ONE WHOLE MONTH WITHOUT RESTAURANT CUISINES???
• Am I only doing this so I have an excuse to instagram what I eat??? sigh... 

s t a y   t u n e d . . . . . .